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Favorite Activities: Planning your future life together. He’s needy, a fussy eater and probably has a peanut allergy to boot. If you really want to date one: Start wearing dungarees, now.

ARISTO GERMAN MALE Daddy was the Kaiser’s favorite nephew. It’s just a shame Germany got rid of their royals in 1918.He may have an ability to speak boarding school English with a fake Eton accent.While many German men are often six feet tall and blond, Aristos are always six feet tall and blond.If you really want to go out with one: Lose weight and get used to Saturday nights drinking orange juice. Has a facial expression not dissimilar to a spaniel that has been beaten up one too many times.NEEDY GERMAN MALE: Usually in his mid-to-late twenties, the needy German male has generally just been dumped by his first girlfriend with whom he had been together since he hit puberty. Then he realizes the solution: He needs a replacement girlfriend. Habitat: Needy German male is probably still studying and light years away from getting a proper job (Germans can stretch their university degree courses over a decade).But before you enter the minefield that is German-men-dating, be sure you know what's awaiting you.

The Survival Bible has put together a guide to some common Teutonic types.

INTELLECTUAL GERMAN MALE Stop reading Heat magazine! Intellectual German Male won’t be seen dead with you if you don’t. Distinguishing marks: Looks and dresses like Robin Williams in “Dead Poet’s Society." Just less American. Favorite Activities: Listening to 1980s hard rock and moaning about capitalism, the euro and the fact his rent costs more than 3 pounds a week. Birkenstock-wearing, lentil-eating, Organic German Male is right-on when it comes to global warming, nuclear power and organic gardening.

He’s spent his entire life cocooned in a university, is fluent in Serbo-Croatian and doesn’t own a television. Habitat: Pseudo-arty Berlin cafés with gilded mirrors and black and white pictures of Marlene Dietrich on the wall. OSSI GERMAN MALE He can say "I Love You" in Russian. For Ossi German male -- a product of former East Germany -- life was better when the Berlin Wall was still standing, or so they'll tell you. Yawn Distinguishing marks: Organic German Males usually have big troubled eyes (the planet is dying, you know).

You’re likely therefore, to catch a glimpse of him and his geeky Internet-addicted mates at higher education establishments, grubby clubs and student canteens.

Their apartments tend to be chock full of books and CDs with a bicycle propped against the wall next to the couch.

SPORTY GERMAN MALE “I never, ever got involved in sport,” said Winston Churchill wisely. My one brief encounter with Sporty German Male included a doomed mini-break to Mallorca. “If you were fat, my sweetness, you would not be here!